I: It certainly seems like a daunting task to cram an entire Asian language just for the chance to be a menial laborer in Asia, and occupy a lower position than I could probably obtain in America. I suppose if I has some kind of passion for this country as a Utopia, I could easily take on the task and bare any burden. But I’m not actually filled with passion for Asia. The one thing I want is an escape for white men. But at least on the internet, Asia is facing an invasion of white men anyway. And while there might be less whites in Asia, what they lack in numbers, they make up in quality. You see whites in America, they can just be ordinary dudes or even a girl. In Asia, every single white you see, is assumed to be the worst type of expat.
U: Now you have often been accused of using race as a scapegoat, to mask your own personal flaws. Here you are being offered the solution to your main issue- white people. And don’t say you can’t hate people because you are half white. Glenn Beck thinks Obama hates white people. Quite a few of the conservative white men who marry Asian women also believe this. Obama, is as much white as he is black. You mention your white last name, and the fact that you are cut off from your Asian culture. Obama has even more claim to this, his Kenyan dad left when he was a kid, and he didn’t even visit his home village until he was in his 20s. He was raised entirely by his white mom and grandparents. He had even less contact with his Kenyan relatives than you did with your Asian ones. Now is Obama, a Black president, or is he equally a white president? That is not even a question. If the one-drop rule applies so clearly with Mulattoes, why is there all this angst about Hapas being not really Asian?
I: Because its even worse to be Asian than to be Black, as seen by the difference between AMWF and BMWF. Asian is something no man wants to be. And so even Hapas who look Asian, will use any excuse they can to claim that their white dad, makes them not really Asian.
U: Look your mom made a mistake. It wasn’t done maliciously. It was done ignorantly, perhaps negligently. Your parents aren’t the WMAFs of the internet. Under different circumstances, there would be absolutely nothing wrong with them on that count. But in a WMAF society, its impossible to separate it. It was a mistake for you to be born of WMAF in America. This can rectify the mistake.
I: Its a little late in life, to pretend, I’m just a normal Asian in Asia born of AMAF parents. In a way, I’m a victim of my own
propaganda. I’m willing to play Devil’s Advocate with myself. So I wanted to know the GDP per capita of my mom’s homeland. IF it was significantly lower than USA, I could at least be grateful for the economic benefits. But not only was it not much lower, according to projections, it was expected to soon exceed the USA. According to psychologists this is the ideal type of happiness. A poor man getting richer and richer, is happier than a rich man getting poorer and poor. The rise is more joyful than the fall, even if you end up in the same place. And the other thing to consider is that there is less income inequality in Asia. The GDP per capita, does nothing for people in the middle and bottom, if you don’t actually see the money. With a lower Gini coefficient, it means you can actually get some of that GDP. So there was no need for me to be the least bit grateful about being born in USA to WMAF. Not only do I suffer social degradation, but I can’t even say I’m being paid off for it. Equal economic circumstances with much worse social, racial, sexual situation. If anything, the data, would only hate my parents more. I was trying to be nice, and be grateful for the better life they gave me, compared to Asia. And I only end up resenting them more.
U: And this is what lead you to finally consider the move to Asia. You’ve thought about it on and off since high school. Although not to your mom’s country. But somewhere in Asia. Part of it is, you didn’t want to do the work for it, which you aren’t crazy about now either. And you can be blamed for laziness on that count. Lets say the USA is a totally racist nation. You are offered an escape from it, but are too lazy to climb out. If your imaginary AMAF Half-Bro in Asia is living such a serene life in the Confucian hive, why can’t you join him? Sure being a Hapa immigrant at this age, isn’t the same thing as being born there of AMAF parents. But if its so much a better society to live in, you still have the chance to do it, even as a Hapa. And you might very well encounter whites only as ghosts in the wind. Understandably when comments advised you to go to Asia to find a wife, you were very put off. There is no pleasure in being with a woman, who you find both physically and morally repulsive. Theres no joy, in being with a person you hate and despise. But that isn’t the bait for this offer. The bait if a chance to be a worker drone in the Confucian hive. To live with a totally different value system. And even if their culture is corrupted by McDonaldization, at least they will all look homogeneous. There wont be white people. And at the end of the day, it doesn’t have to be about values for you. If everyone looks like you, and you no longer have to suffer as a minority, thats good enough.
I: It would be a lot easier to just suicide. Why take up such a burden, for a life I’m not even enthusiastic about, and wont even be that great? Its an even harder life, than that which awaits me in USA. The only benefit, is no white people. And even that is not an absolute. What they lack in quantity in Asia, they more than make up for in quality. Every single white guy in Asia, is a WMAF right out of the internet. In the same way that withdrawing from the USA to the web, just made things worse. This could be a leap from the pan into the WMAF fire. Now that truly would be hell. The burden of learning Asian, adjusting to a new society, struggling with no prospects, only to be stuck with the worst of wmaf.
U: If the situation is that bad, that even in a wealthy Asian home nation, they live under the heels of WMAF. Then truly Asians are a hopeless case, and theres nothing to be done with them. If you can’t escape the humiliation of Asians, in Asia, then truly all is lost. Africa is poor. But if a Black man chose to go back to Africa, he could be assured that he would be living under a Nationalist government of Blacks for Blacks and by Blacks. He would find what he was looking for. If Asians, the most populous on earth, can’t go anywhere to be at home, then truly they are a dead race.
I: Perhaps I’m a tad apocalyptic. But with all the news of the Rise of Asia, I don’t feel like crap is getting any better. Alright maybe thats my 1st world problems perspective. Having taken economics for granted, perhaps I don’t take the genuine achievements seriously enough. It is no small thing to lift millions out of poverty. And probably its better to live in an Asian Tiger Nation than Africa.
U: If you are so angry at Asian females, will Asia really free you from hate? You will still be hating the female half of the population. If you can’t stand the sight of Asian women, in Asia you will be overwhelmed with ugliness.
I: Its WMAF I hate. If all I’m seeing in Asia is AMAF, I wont care. You’re right, if Asia is full of WMAF it will be leaping from the pan into the fire. Maybe suicide is the answer. Well theres always time. I can at least visit Asia and do some reconnaissance and see if it is white free. If there really are almost no white people. Then it deserves serious consideration at least. This would be the total undoing of my WMAF birth. It will be like my whole life never happened and I was just a normal Asian guy born in Asia to AMAF parents. I mentioned how I hate the life of the average Asian-American man. But I could live an ordinary Asian life, if I wasn’t at the bottom of a racial hierarchy pyramid.
U: It would be hypocritical of you, if you say that your whole problem is living among racist whites, and you turn down a chance of escape. If Asia is genuinely free of whites, then you have no excuse not to emigrate.
I: I told my mom, the one reason I would be happier in Asia, is because I would escape the white people I hate so much. She asked me if I hated my dad and grandparents. And I said “YES! YES! 1000 times YES!” That I had a volcano of rage and hatred underneath, that I had no choice but to keep suppressed in order to maintain my leeching off my parents. But it doesn’t make it go away.
U: This is your chance to put yourself where your mouth is.
I: Of course this doesn’t make me an actual AMAF son born in Asia. My life did happen. Its much more difficult to integrate into Asia at this point.
U: Even if you don’t fully integrate into Asia, you will have at least escaped your hell.
I: Not if its WMAF heaven as those online allege.
U: You’ve been to Asia yourself and you can vouch with your own eyes, there are hardly any white people there. Haven’t been there in a whiles. But now you can double check.
I: IDK maybe I really wont ever be accepted anywhere ever. I will be a total stranger in Asia, an alien. If I was a white guy, or a whiter looking Eurasian, ok I could stick out and be a cool alien. But as a basically Asian-looking Hapa, I wont be a special snowflake there. I will be as alienated as a white.
U: The option of suicide will still be open. Lets just check this out.
I: I don’t think I’ll ever be free. I think the burden of being Hapa will kill me. Its not Asia’s job to clean up the Hapa mess. Its America’s fault that Hapa happened. I should be a burden on America not Asia.
U: Do you feel universally hated in USA?
I: My autobiography doesn’t lie. From childhood to now. IDK maybe Hapas just don’t belong in this world. I always knew Asia was an opium pipe dream. And maybe thats all it is now too. A mirage. I don’t think I’ll find any liberation there. I just don’t think Eurasians are fit to live.
U: You need to decide one way or the other.
I: I can make a limited commitment to going to Asia, just to do some reconnaissance and check it out, while keeping the suicide option open. I hate life and have no attachment to it. Still, I can always die, theres no need to throw it away carelessly, without 1st exhausting all options. I think I’ve done my fiduciary duty on that count. I didn’t just rush into death. I explored all options both intellectually and in practice. I made every effort to live every genre of life. If I were to suicide, it would be with total confidence that I was born into a life not worth living, and that none of my choices could change it. If its necessary to cross off one last possibility, to be totally confident in the rationality of my suicide, thats fine.
U: Of course half-heartedness is the enemy of success. If you believe it will fail, it will.
I: I’m not going to work my ass off for a maybe. I’m make a partial commitment. As far as I’m concerned this is recon. I want to know which claims about Asia are true. If its really true, that I’d be totally free of whites, then yes, it would be hard for me to turn down the chance, without being a hypocrite. If Asia, genuinely has no white people, I will make my full commitment to living in it. IF Asia is overflowing with WMAF, then I will know for sure, that no life anywhere is worth living for a Hapa. Only the evidence can decide.
U: And so if you do not encounter any whites in Asia, you vouch to become an Asian Citizen and integrate?
I: I would be willing to live a quiet life as a sterile worker drone in the Confucian hive.