In the same day I can go whiplashing between 2 opposite extremes on the Eurasian issue. I can feel myself calming down, and feeling maybe I’m a little too harsh on my parents, just because they belong to a category with a lot of bad apples. But then on some random corner of the internet or media, where I thought I was safe, I will have the ugliest aspects of WMAF shoved in my face, and I will rage. How do I balance my desire to separate myself from the whole world of WMAF, with the extreme viciousness displayed by them?
One of the points I’m repeatedly emphasized is that old habits of White-Black binary oppositions don’t work for White-Asian issues. Its much more complex and multivaried. Hence, I’m often attacked for racism, by those seeing race in those traditional terms, as I try to untangle the web. So lets stop looking at WMAF as a binary opposition between evil WMAFs and good-leaning WMAFs. I consider my own parents to be among good-leaning WMAFs, but its hard for me to admit that there are any good WMAFs, when the structural racism of the bad ones corrupts them all. Why are there so many more “good” WMAFs than good AMWFs? These couplings don’t happen in one direction by accident. And so even if not subjectively malicious, there is definitely objective WMAF privilege in even the best of them.
Instead of Good WMAF vs Bad WMAF, lets look at it as a continuum. On one extreme lets hold the openly evil, racist, sexist, satanic WMAF. These couples actually do exist, and in rather large numbers. On the other hand are good-leaning WMAFs. Basically decent people, not perfect. Perhaps actively anti-racist to varying degrees. But still ultimately profiting from WMAF privilege. But its not either/or. The vast majority of WMAF is in the middle somewhere inbetween. Its my perception that the WMAF center leans much more towards the evil than good-leaning side. But they might not have the pure sadistic satanism as displayed by some WMAFs in my comments sections. Most WMAF couples lean towards, racism and sexism, but not with the fiery honesty of the most vicious of them. If the WMAF numbers lean overwhelming towards the bad side, what impact does this have on the good-leaning ones? Should what extent should they be judged for the crimes of their category? These are difficult issues, and deeply personal to me, as they directly impact how I treat my own family.
Why am I so bothered by evil WMAFs, how does it affect me? Suppose hypothetically all Black women hated Asian men. If Black women were known to especially despise Asians, and had a bunch of blogs about how disgusting Asian men were. Its never good to be attacked, but it wouldn’t cut so deep as WMAF attacks do. I don’t have any interest in Asian women, so why do their attacks mean so much? Well, part of the reason is races are just naturally paired together. This is
caricatured as patriarchal Asian men “owning” their women. But the truth is the opposite, de facto every other race of men “owns” their women accept Asians. Even WMAFs will rely on the trope that Asian men and women were “made for each other”, and thats why both have the smallest parts. In that sense Asian women hating Asian men, is a much more powerful message to the world than Black women would be. Now I wish the genders of a race were not associated with each other. If as a Eurasian male, I had nothing to do with Asian women, that would be wonderful. But thats not the case. For better or for worse the 2 sexes of each race are paired together. And since Asian women are the only women at the dance complaining about their partner, it sends a loud message to all men and women, that Asian men are the worse. And of course evil WMAFs are quite open in explicitly and loudly stating this implicit message.
And then these same WMAF couples go onto have kids, and WMAF issues become Hapa issues. Its a pretty ugly situation all around. And I wish more neutral, objective observers would take a good hard look at the issues I’m gesturing at, instead of just demonizing me as racist and insane. Look I’d love to see races break down, and us to become a big rainbow race. I once bought the lie that race-mixing helped undermine racism. But these just aren’t the facts on the ground. WMAF is quite clearly a power relationship based on domination. And no one suffers from it more than the Eurasian children. In an ideal world, races wouldn’t mean anything and there be tons of WMAF and AMWF. And not just White-Asians mixing as the “2 best races”, but all kinds of mixes with the rainbow. And while there wouldn’t be any strict 1:1 quota in mixings, the digressions would be based on random drift, and not structural power relations. As WMAF to AMWF is happening now, with an observed 100:1 ratio, it very much is about power, sexism, racism, and not rainbow love. I hope my readers can look into these specific issues, and not just write me off as a hater against mixing.