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Reading this blog, you are only seeing me as I am now. Your not seeing my whole life journey. And thats why its easy to form misconceptions about me and my parents and turn me into a caricature. In fact what brought me here is a rich and quintessentially American story. While the Hapa-American experience for me has been one of profound and involuntary, alienation and foreignness from the American experience, a right I once thought I was entitled to by way of my dad’s DNA, it is also something right out of Moby Dick, Huck Finn, Catcher in the Rye, the Great Gatsby. Always longing for the unobtainable Great White Whale on the other side. The hopeless doomed quest. And of course race is itself at the heart of America. Only in America do we really have this sense of “whiteness” outside of ethnicity. And lets face it, however much we love America, we built it the same way Hitler wanted to build his New Order in Europe. Only difference is we killed Indians instead of Jews to make room for living space, and we used Black slaves instead of Slavs. Whatever good may come out of America, that is our Original Sin that haunts this nation of Pilgrims to this day.

So yes the first half of my story, is just the attempt to be American. And in that way I actually understand where the sell-out Asian females are coming from. I showed off my white dad, the same way they show off their white boyfriends. The fact that my DNA was 50% white, seemed proof to me that I was just as American as I was Asian. How could I be considered foreign, when I was born here, had no contact with the Orient, and had a dad who’s ancestors probably went back further than many white people’s? Of course this should not privilege the Hapa position over the pure Asian. While I have the biological factor for what its worth, Wesley Yang’s article showed me that many full Asians have the same feeling of being a white dude in an Asian guy’s body. I got called a Banana by one Asian dude in high school. I remember during my 1st day of college. This Asian guy approached me and said you don’t look full asian. Let me guess its your mom who’s asian, you never see it the other way around.

I guess what made it tragic for me. Was that it in my younger days, I had brown hair and rounder eyes. And so random people would approach and ask what I was. Not looking full Asian was a sort of security. Even now there are some people who are surprised that I’m Asian. On the other hand there have been plenty of full Asians who have assumed I’m just another American Asian. If a full Asian thinks your Asian, then your Asian. And so I tried to out-white whitey and out-America America by being a superpatriot.

I guess what really brought home for me who I was, was seeing It all started with April Wilkner from America’s Next Top Model. Now you might think that April would be the kind of sell out whore I hate. Indeed there is a lot of hate about her on forums, about her being ashamed of her Asian identity. Janice Dickinson called her out to her face about her shame. That probably is how I would look at it now actually. But at the time, it was my Eurasian identity that defined me. And I really could relate to Apri. She would show off her curly haired nerdy white dad and brag he looked like Art Garfunkel. Janice tried to push April to be the Asian one. And April felt she shouldn’t have to be typecast. Like me at the time, she felt that her white dad, made her just as white, just as AMERICAN and unforeign as she was Japanese. And so at the time I didn’t see it as self-hate. I saw it as reality. Me and April are both just as white as we are Asian, so why are we less American? Why do we get told to go back to Asia, when our blood runs to Europe equally? Why the 1-drop rule? Of course there is a measure of egalitarianism to the 1-drop rule, in the sense that here in America we don’t have the rigid racial feudal pyramid of Latin America, where every last drop of precious rare white blood counts. Here its all or nothing.

And so April was a turning point. While initally I tried to embrace my Hapa identity. I realized I had nothing in common with Hapas. That the world was always going to treat me as Asian and thats just what I was. And as much as I hated to admit it, Janice Dickinson was right. And so I became a big Asian nationalist. I took out my anger on the white man, while seeing Asian women as innocent victims. I said my dad was like a white slave owner raping his slaves. It is only fairly recently, when armed with sociobiology and evolutionary psychology, that I realize that women do the sexual selection, and women are to blame. This actually has a personal impact to. I’ve never done detailed interviews about my parent’s past dating history. But as far as I can tell, my dad dated plenty of white and latina girls before mom. And I’m not sure if he even dated ANY Asian girls before her. Mom on the other hand, I know less about, but I have the sneaking suspicion she dated only white men in America. And an abnormally high percentage of her friends and family seem to end up with white men

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Now some commentors here in order to make themselves feel better, tell me that my WM/AF is uniquely bad, and that their one of the “good” ones. I tried to comfort myself about my parents in the same way. After all, they met right here in America, through a mutual white friend. And my dad is less than 5 years older than her. So so much for assuming that my parents are a special case. The fact is, as much as I bash my parents, I have far more respect for their relationship than the majority of 2011 WM/AF couples. If you ask me the trend through the 1990s and 2000s and into the 2010s is for WM/AFs to get more and more disreputable. Only the war brides/rapes of Japan, Korea, Nam compare.

So yeah it may seem like I identify totally as an Asian male. And I often refer to myself simply as an Asian male, cuz thats what society sees me as. But I spent much of my life, desperately trying to be considered full white, and failing that at least trumpeted and advertised my Hapaness. Its possible that all biracial kids living in a racist society are going to have identity problems. But I think the huge influx of WM/AFs, the scarcicty of AM/WFs, and perhaps most importantly the reasons justifying WM/AF, make life incredibly difficult for the Hapa sons of WM/AF.

So we got yet another AM/WF white girl posting at this blog. Geez do you guys have a global newsletter or something? Are you just that loving and maternal, that you find every single website on the internet, that might possibly trouble your future kids? Wow what a difference from WM/AF. Anyway I decided to turn my long response into a new post, since I think it touches on a lot of key issues with WM/AF. I just had an interesting conversation with my Asian mom yesterday. Where she was bragging about her younger cousin marrying a white dude. I’m thinking what the hell is wrong with her damn family. Then she has the nerve to suggest I follow that WMs example and go to Asia for a wife. And I let her know very clearly I have 0 interest in Asian women, and that white dudes who go to Asia for a wife are considered losers. She has the gall to bring up Murdoch and his Tiger Wife. What is it with her and Tiger women? Last time when I challenged her, she brought up Amy Chua Tiger Mom. Perhaps she doesn’t realize Tiger is an insult. Then she calls me a racist.

 

Because the disparity between the AM/WF response to this blog, and the WM/AF response is shocking. Especially considering how rare AM/WF really is in the real world. The fact of the matter is, white women contribute as much to the WM/AF disparity as Asian women and white men do, by racistly rejecting Asian men. If white women didn’t reject Asian men, so readily, then there wouldn’t be a disparity even if there was a ton of WM/AF. On online dating an AM has to make 250K MORE than a white man just to get a response from a white woman. My idiot white dad encourages me to try online dating, despite astronomical stats like that. I believe the next heighest- black men- only have to make 70K more than a white man. MY stupid WM/AF parents encourage online dating and Asian girls, the two type of women I would be sure to avoid. As an Asian male, my only hope is to win girls in the real world with daring. There is no other choice. So white women are even more racist against Asian men than Asian women are. But of course its more “sane” for white women to be racist against Asians than it is for Asian woman to be.

Ok so with that disclaimer. The difference between the white and Asian women who have posted on this blog has been astronomical. I know that white men like to praise Asian women as submissive and quiet, and bash white women as loud feminist cows. But maybe white women have more actual humanity, that becomes with being less obedient and more of a real person. Perhaps you need freedom and equality to be capable of real love. All racial stereotpes aside, on this blog at least, its been white women who give a shit about their children, and Asian women who callously dismiss it, just caring about their personal happiness. So I didn’t think it was possible, but all the opinions from white women on this blog has actually made my opinion of Asian women drop even lower. At first I was angry at all the AM/WFs posting here. What are there like 12 of you in existence, and you have to come to my dinky blog, while the WM/AFs dont give a shit and party on? BUt now I’m actually glad you all posted here. Seeing how loving AM/WF is exceeded all expectations, and is part of what inspired me to just lie to everyone that I’m a son of AM/WF.

And trust me, most Eurasian girls, who consider themselves more than cheap whores and playthings to amuse old white grandpas, would also much rather come from AM/WF. One Southeast Asian Hapa girl, posted here a sad story about how she has to see young teen girls with much older white men, right there in her own country. She said she wised for a kind loving white mom, like her friends had, over her cruel Tiger Mom who took out her hatred of Asians on her innocent daughter. So I think a Hapa daughter would love and respect you, and be very grateful she is not offspring of a WM/AF. I think you marrying an Asian man, despite all the de-masculinizing stereotypes against them, would encourage a Hapa daughter to view herself as human being, and not just as a toy to satisfy the pleasures of a white man’s lust. HAving a dad, who went against the stereotypes of masculinity, would breed a much healthier daughter who in adulthood would expect love and compassion from men and not just brute dominance.

WM/AFs are not just anti-Asian, they are anti-feminist because white women have gotten too bitchy and feminist, so poor white man has to go overseas for his obedient maid. How do you think that impacts on a female (Asian or white looking) offspring?

The analogy between a Hapa daughter looking at AM/WF and me looking at WM/AF is just ridiculous. And is probably based on the assumption, I’m against race mixing, when I’m only against racial domination. Perhaps if your daughter looks Asian, she will face challenges she wouldn’t if she were pure white. I’m not going to lie and pretend racism against Asians doesn’t exists when the whole point of this blog is that it does exist. What is the biggest symptom of the racism against Asians? The huge WM/Af, AM/WF disparity. So you as a white woman, loving her Asian dad, would only inspire your daughter, that your love could overcome the huge racism against Asian men. Your daughter would learn a totally different lesson from AM/WF than I did from WM/AF. To use the analogy of me and my white dad. Its very unlikely that your daughter would view you as a white woman “stealing” Asian men from Hapa/Asian girls like herself. Its not like Asian or white girls face the same obstacles in western society that asian men do, so the whole basis for the resentment wouldn’t be there. And as I’ve said earlier seeing the example of your AM/WF in the face of a cruel racist WM/AF society, could give your daughter an inspiration and courage, that I never had in my shitty life.

Anyway THANKS for posting AM/WF, your giving me more ideas about who my make believe AM/WF parents should be, and just how awesome they are!

Hey I just solved my whole Wm/Af problem. Simplest thing in the world. I just tell people I have an Asian dad, and a hot white mom. Problem solved. So simple. I can’t believe I let this drag out for so many years. Telling people I’m AM/WF is actually better than telling people I’m full Asian, since it shows an Asian masculine enought to get a YT. And it takes advantage of my mixed looks for good. This old guy at the gym, was surprised I was a former buddhist because I didn’t look Asian. I’m sorry I take not looking Asian as a compliment. But in America it is. Anyway I said my dad was Asian and my mom was NORDIC. He said thats a good mix.

Stupidly I lied to people at places my mom goes. This reminds me of the old days when I wanted people to think I was pure white, and lied about my mom. Even claiming she was an Asian maid. For people my mom actually might meet, I should just say I’m full Asian. I was just so excited by this new  reveleation, I couldn’t help putting it into action at every opprotunity.

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So yeah after years of agonizing over it. Its so obvious. Just tell people my dad is yellow and my mom is aryan.

I knew a AM/WF hapa in high school, who was a great footballer and popular with the white ladies. And this AM/WF hapa blogger was saying how much more masculine his type of hapa is compared to my type wm/af.

As an Asian looking guy, I must have been retarded to brag i had a white dad! Why would I advertise the fact that white men are better at getting Asian women, than Asian men. I might as well have chopped off my balls and handed them over.

But by claiming I have a tough Asian dad, and a hot European mom, I’m showing how tough Asian men are. I just hope the real AM/WF hapas aren’t pissed that a freak like me is claiming to be one of them.

Also it shows that I don’t give a shit about Asian racial purity or anything like that. I’m proud of race-mixing. I’m proud to be a Hapa. I’m proud to be the son of an asian male who overcame all odds to claim a white prize. Its about Asian masculinity. And the people at this blog helped me come to this conclusion. Because they forced me to realize just how much I liked AM/WF. They also claimed that AM/WF sons look just as Asian as WM/AF sons. That is genetically untrue. But hey most peeps don’t know genetics, so might as well live the lie. So simple. Lying in front of me all these years. And its an even more masculine thing to tell white girls, then to brag about being full Asian. Instead I can brag that my yellow dad, caught him a white girl. Hapaness can be the road to happiness for once in my life. Happy to be Hapa. Hapa and proud. And all it took was turning Wim Affe into Aam Wiff. So I’m not ashamed to be mixed. A mongrel. A mutt. I’m proud to be a AM/WF hapa. Apologies to the real AM/WFs but my heart is in the right place in promoting AMs. My only fear is that AM/WF will get the blame for an abomination like me, when WM/AF deserves it. But its a risk I’m willing to take. Because most people don’t even believe AM/WF exists. As sucky as I maybe, at least if I tell people I’m an AM/WF son, they will know an AM/WF exists. This may not save the world, or even Asian-American manhood. But at least it conclusively solves my personal dilemma. And however much I may suck, at least I will be spreading the word out there that AM/WF exists. And for now thats the best we can hope for.

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So from now on I Stuff Eurasian Males Like am the son of a Asiatic dad and a hot white mom. My dad is Genghis Khan and he captured my sexy caucasian mom, during his raid on Europe and made her his harem slave.

“nothing is worse than getting together with a loser…. Oh sad you… You want some pathetic sympathy, yeah, you got it…oh poor baby boy…. Good enough?”

You can actually hear the thick pidgin Chinese accent in that comment. Perfectly matching the caricature of a AF with a WM. A thick foreign broken accent, vicious attacks on Asian and Hapa males. And a worshipful attitude towards her white savior. All the comments by Asian women on this blog have been nasty and hate-filled.

At 1st I was disturbed that two White females dating Asian males, had made it to this blog. Typical Hapa failure I thought, I try to explain myself to the conscience of WM/AF, and all I suceed in doing is messing with AM/WF. But on reflection I’m glad that WFs dating AMs posted on this blog. Why? Because it just confirms what I have always believed. White females are not only infinitely more beautiful physically than Asian females, they also have much better hearts. All you have to do is look at a white female, and you’ll see the lie of WM/AF. No white man who had a chance with even the worst white female, would give it up for even the best Asian female. White men can’t stand that white females are actual human beings and not mere sex dolls, so they rip on them for being over-liberated bitches and feminists. White men dream of stripping white women of all their humanity, of humiliating, dominating, degrading and subjecting them to the level of a submissive, subservient, grovelling, Oriental “wife”. The Asian wife, is his fantasy for the white woman made real on a lesser woman. Why do the biggest anti-feminist misogynists who hate women, LOVE Asian women? But at least on this blog, it was white women not Asian women who should maternal loving care. White women actually give a shit about how their kids are going to feel. While I’m sorry for disturbing the peace of any AM/WF relationship, I’m glad to know that white females actually worry about the issues raised on this blog. White females have read this blog, and worry that their hapa children, might suffer from all the things I mentioned. Isn’t that beautiful? White women are actual human beings!!! They might not layover and play the China doll for you, but they’ll actually love you and your children and not just Tiger Mom them.

Tiger moms don’t give a shit about their future hapa sons- drop dead is their only reply. White moms actually want their future kids to be happy and have a good life.

I mean in the real world AM/WF is incredibly rare, and white women are actually incredibly racist towards Asian men. Demaing they make $250,000 more than a white man, just to get a response on online dating. And so considering how rare they are in the world, it pissed me off that the few AM/WF in existance made it to this measly blog on the edge of internet. But you know what? So much the better. AM/WFs love their future kids that much, that they wil find this blog at the edge of the internet, out of motherly concern about any obstacles their children might face. White men praise Asian women as being more feminine than white women. But if femininity means more than just being a sex-toy China doll, and actually loving and caring, then hands down white women beat Asian women in femininity.

So yeah I’ve found the difference between WF and AF responses to this blog to be most enlightening. Although really I don’t want WFs dating AM to comment or even read this blog.

But since you did. Thank you. Thank you for actually giving a shit about your children’s future, unlike Asian females, even though this blog was not even meant for you.

Whats it like being Half-White and Half-Asian? Thats an important question for a changing America. With the flood of interracial relationships, and with mixed-race being the fastest growing race in America, there are going to be quite a few Hapa males around. White-Asian marriages seem to be the most common mix. If close to 50% of Asian women marry White men, and 50% of them have males as kids, that means 1 in 4 Asian-American women are going to have a Hapa male like me as a son. So yeah Hapa males are kind of a big deal when 25% of Asian-American women have them as kids.

So what is it like? Humiliation, degradation, terror, fear, embarrassment, shame, self-hated, angst, debasement, sadness, hopelessness, pain, anger, rage, etc etc need I go on? You can’t imagine the internal conflict. The brutal civil war inside all Hapa males. The Hapa Paradox. We exist because Asian men are humiliated and emasculated, and yet we are Asian males. We are at war with ourselves from birth. The idea that an Asian man like me, is genetically 50% white, and carries ONLY the white-male Y chromosome. The Asian Y-chromosome is dead in me. Asian maleness is dead in me. I’m a Eunuch. I’m an Asian male inside a dead Asian male. That is what it means to be half-white, half-asian. All the way back in the 2nd grade, thats how I defined my identity. I would introduce my essay by saying My name is SEML and I’m half white and half asian. So when I was only 7 years old, that was already who I was. My very identity. The thing that made me me, for better or worse. And life has shown it is only for worse. The law of life for the Hapa male is that Murphy was an optimist, everything that can’t go wrong, will go wrong. Has gone wrong. Life is a daily rape for the Hapa male. One long humiliation. One long emasculation. It feels like acid runs through my veins, like my skeleton wants to jump out of my body and strangle me. That is what it means to be an Eurasian male. The very term Hapa is a colonial term from Hawaii. A slur. And what else do Hapas deserve but slurs? So its appropriate that Hapa pride means taking pride in a slur. Non-Hapas can not imagine what it is like to be a Hapa. To be the Asian son of a white man and Asian woman. It is an unimaginable hell. Dante’s Inferno could not devise a more cruel torture. Its like being strangled from the inside.

What kind of life do WM/AFs think they can give their Asian-looking sons? What goes through their heads, when the DR says “its a boy”? What right do they think they have to rule over an Asian man? What makes a white man and an asian woman a parent to an asian man? How can they curse an innocent infant with such a miserable life that they have created? they make this world a shitty place to be an Asian male, and they they create an Asian male. It is the worst form of child abuse.

Its bad enough being an Asian-American male watching WM/AF from the outside. Can you imagine being a Hapa male, feeling WM/AF from the INSIDE? Feeling WM/AF inside you? It is a rape. Life is just a long torture and rape for the Hapa male. Hated by all. Asian males hate hapa males too, when they realize they are hapa. But Asian men are right to hate Hapas. When they look at me, all they can see is WM/AF. Can I blame Asian men for hating me, when I hate myself far far far more for the exact same reason? If they knew more about me, they would hate me more. To the white race, I’m just yellow subhuman scum. The best I can do is get on my knees, and constantly advertise my white dad, and beg for a modicum of acceptance. The good guys hate me because I’m evil, the bad guys hate me because they are evil. Hapas are unloveable monsters. Freaks. Beasts. Subhuman scum. We wander this earth, hounded from all directions. Strangers in every land. Homeless. Raceless. Strangers to strangers. We are ghosts without bodies. And then I think 1/4 children Asian women produce are in my exact same situation. To be hapa is to be hapless. The one good thing about being hapa is you have 1 WM/AF in the world you can hold hostage- your own parents. WM/AFs don’t have to give a shit what their Asian brothers, fathers, family and friends think. They do have to give a little crap what their own son thinks. So its a big deal to them, when the offspring of WM/AF calls out WM/AF to their face. That is the one power in the world, Hapas possess, the power to be a terrible son. Hows that for a revolt against Confucian filial piety?

Will you call me a racist if I say I hate white men? How can you when I am just as white as I am Asian? If I’m to give the devil his due, and say one nice thing about white men it is that his sperm produces beautiful daughters, while Asian sperm produces repulsive she-beasts.

A whiteboy writes:”WHITE GUYS AND ASIAN GIRLS ARE THE FUTURE , TOGETHER THEY ARE GOING TO CREATE A EURASIAN SUPER RACE OF BEAUTIFUL AND HYPERINTELLIGENT CHILDREN” Glad to be part of that future of beautiful and intelligent Eurasian males, who get treated by the world as Asians and thus look at WM/AFs including their own parents the same way bitter Asian guys do.

So anyway thats just a little window into the world of the Hapa man, one of the fastest growing populations in 21st century America!

Asian women have left behind the dusty Confucian foot-binding harem of the Orient and embraced the freedom and liberation of the West. What better way to prove that unlike their brothers, they are REAL Americans, then to be liberated modern feminists??? Except nothing proves just what a FOBy foreigner you are, then to think feminism means submission to the white man. Yellow feminism means getting on your knees for the white man. Strange that all strands of genuine all-American feminism, White Black Red Brown, all assume that the White Man is the one keeping women down. But Yellow Feminism means getting down for whitey. Thus White men who can’t stand how bitchy, spoiled and uppity and feminist white women are, well praise Asian women for standing up to their cruel masters and finding liberation in strong white hairy arms.

Asian girls HATE white girls. Asian girls just can’t get white girls. White girls are blessed to own the most handsome, hairy, rich, smart, strong, powerful, manly men in the world. And they don’t treat their men right. When an Asian girl sees a white girl dating a Black,Brown or Latino man, her mouth drops in shock. Talk about tossing pearls before swine. Asian women aren’t even at the top of the hierarchy, yet they are more racist than white women. Asian women look down on Black, Brown and Latino men far more than the daughters of the KKK do. The fathers of white girls who date black men, lynched, the fathers of Asian girls who refuse to date Asian, Black or Brown men were lynched by white men. Viva la difference!

But Asian women know how to treat their poor white men, right if white girls won’t do the job. Sucky, sucky me love you long time. Asian women aspire to be the women, white men deserve. Sweet, quiet, silent, submissive, obedient, worshipful. They will stoop to humiliations and degradations, white women could not begin to imagine. And they will do it with a smile, and a happy ending. An Asian women will gladly do for free things that would make a white prostitute barf. IF white girls don’t know how good they have it with white men, Asian girls are more than happy to take up the load. Ahhh the white men. Those Viking beasts that conquered the world. Those masters of civilization. Who would ever dream that the daughter of that yellow race of slaves, would be able to share the bed with such a classical work of art? If white women find slaves and gardeners sexier than Mastah, so much the worse for white women. Sally can sneak out back, while Ching Chong runs the plantation with Mastah.
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Poor poor white man. Surrounded on all sides by reverse racism, immigration, affirmative action, the yellow peril, mean ol feminists, but don’t worry. Ching Chong is hear to make it all better. When an Asian woman sees a white girl taking white boys for granted, her blood boils with rage. What she would give to have the chance to be a Geisha girl, to the geekiest loser among whites. What the white woman throws in the trash, the Geisha picks up as treasure. Sally’s trash is a Geisha’s treasure. No white boy left behind.

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a beautiful hapa boy in the baby carriage- ME!

It seems kind of funny to me, that the same Asian women who make the WM/AF justifications, which basically come down to Asian-bashing, white-worshiping, and callously dismiss Asian men, saying they owe them nothing, would be so shocked that an Asian-looking Hapa son of WM/AF would feel so much resentment towards WM/AF. Wm/Afs try to present themselves as a young rebels against the stodgy old patriarchy of Confucian traditionalism. Some greybeard old man with a thick accent saying “I forbid you to marry that white man, our ancient traditions insist you marry Ching Weng Chong.”  But of course love and the future wins out in the end. And all peoples white, black, yellow and brown go to the prom to celebrate. Cue cameras, and happy hollywood ending. So it comes as a shock to them, when suddenly WM/AF represents the parental generation, and its’ the children attacking WM/AF. Suddenly their the oppressive parents of the past, and its the future attacking them. When you build the whole foundation of WM/AF on shitting on Asian males, how the hell is an Asian-looking male Hapa supposed to deal with it? Is he supposed to champion it? Be oh so happy for you? If your fathers and brothers attack you, oh thats just your stodgy traditional family. But what about when its your 50% white, out of your womb, son? Does that make it different? So if Asian women are shocked by me, I’m shocked that they’re shocked by me. The thing is, its’ hard to attack your own parents. And even when I was a militant nationalist, I was just pro-Asian, not explicitly anti-Wm/Af. It is only recently that I have the gall to attack WM/AF to my parent’s face. And you know what it feels good!

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I get it I get it. Asian women are free and liberated against patriarchy. They express this freedom by marrying white men. Ask Latino and Black feminists how much liberation they want from the white man. Latino and Black women have some consciousness of American history. ITs funny, Asian women see their “yellow feminism” as a break with their foreignness and proof of their Americanization. And yet Black, Latina, or even White feminists, would never define feminism as submitting to the white man. So by defining “feminism” as loving the white men, Asian women just show just how foreign they are to American culture. Anyone who knew crap about American culture, would know that loving the white man is the exact opposite of feminism. Thats why white men oppose feminism for all women except Asian women. Against white women, Asian women are submissive, quiet, obedient China dolls who know their place as a woman. But against Asian men, white men are sensitive feminists liberating Asian women from the chains of foot binding.

So anyway Asian women define “feminism” and “liberation”, as lookatme, I’m an independent individual and I don’t owe Asian men shit. The very idea I owe Asians anything, implies that they own me and thats racist and sexist. So of course they owe their fathers, brothers and friends nothing. BUT… its harder to say you owe your own kids nothing. Unless you wanna go all Casey Anthony on their ass. Which frankly, I wouldn’t have minded. Maybe their oughta be sex-selective abortions for hapa males. It be good revenge no? Problem solved. But short of that, your stuck with your kids. And you brought them into the world as an Asian male. And yet you personally helped shape the world in a way hostile to Asian males. Your personal choices, helped lower the status of all Asian males and now your son has to live with it. Thats why I took pleasure in denying I was white, when a friend payed me the honor of assuming I was a full-white after seeing me aggressively flirt with a hot blonde. I turned down that honor, because to represent myself as anything but an Asian male is to advertise my own emasculation. When I say to people, I have a white dad and asian mom, which I used to until recently, in fact I used to wear my part-whiteness like a badge of honor. When I say that, I’m advertising WM/AF. I’m saying white men are better at getting Asian women, then Asian men like myself. So I might as well just cut my balls off and hand them over, when I say I have a white dad. So thats why I always deny being anything but full-100% Asian if the subject comes up. Whatever shortterm loss from not being a “special” unique exotic Hapa I lose, is worth not showcasing WM/AF.

It shocks me that WM/AFs expect me to be proud of my diverse biracial heritage. Look at me I’m a living United Nations. The melting pot in action. A peace token to the world.

No. The world has always treated me like an Asian male. I feel the same way any Asian male would about WM/AF, the fact that I’m born of it just makes it hurt more. But it in no ways makes me proud of it. So yeah I’m an Asian man, who just happens to have a mom who sleeps with white men, and a white dad who sleeps with Asian women.

IDK when I think of the 1st wave of Asian immigration, those brave Chinese and Japanese single men, who came here without their familes to 1848 California, with the Irish and the Germans and BEFORE the Italians, Eastern Europeans, Greeks, Russians, Polish and Jews. When I think of how they were exterminated by sexual selection, when there were miscegenation laws preventing them from marrying white women. When I think of the extinction of the first Asian-American generation. I realize things aren’t any better now. This time Asian men came with their families. Big woop, the sons aren’t doing any better with white women as they did in 1848, and the women marry white men. So 2011 Asian-America is in just as shitty shape as it was in 1848. We might as well have come over here as single men. At least then we wouldn’t have the false security of Asian women. We would know what we’re going to die out again. So yeah this is the 2nd end of Asian-America, only this time the white man also got the gift of Asian women. Not that that will last since it takes 2 to make an Asian. As I’ve said before Asian-Americans are going to go the way of Native Americans.

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